Today the druid has just been an absolute sensory mess. Looking over the last week there were a number of things that contributed to it. His diet was shot on the Fourth of July and Priest wants me to stop letting him nap. Finally, yesterday he was out all day with the grandparents. So today I end out with a child that is running around in circles unable to focus on anything. We spent some time in the yard early this am, but he was not to happy to be taken back inside when I got bored of watching him run around. From there we had some fruit and milk (almond milk for him and coffee for me). Druid does not like meat but I was able to convince him to have a bit of bacon. Next up speech. He was talkative, but tried to escape every 5 minutes. After that a break, wait for big brother, then OT. By now he was over tired and horribly unregulated. She went through all the sensory things he has ever responded to, then tried a few new ones. Finally his hour was up and she just sighed. He was still keyed up and the only thing left to try was a nap.
Mean while my ability to cope went out the window. I am not as tired as normal, but I am hungry. (pause to cry a bit more) after 2 years of being told that I am overreacting and looking for drama with my kids I am just emotionally exhausted.
"They are just active little boys."
"I don't have any trouble with them when I watch them."
"You are just looking for things to be wrong with them."
I am horribly depressed. We have no diagnosis for the oldest. He is just "delayed" and headstrong. The youngest is delayed because of SPD, but can only function well when he is regulated. Between the two of them I am fighting and constantly trying to regulate them.
The only people I know that understand are online. My husband does not even see it. All he sees is that I am always trying to sleep and the house is a mess. I am a mess. Today it just finally burst. I have been sitting here crying for 1/2 an hour. I feel like a failure. Although I know you will all tell me I am not and I am doing fine, you all know exactly where I am.
Monday, July 12, 2010
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
